This is going to be a really different kind of post than I usually put out there, but I am struggling falling asleep tonight and I cannot pinpoint what it is exactly that is keeping me up so I’m just going to throw a bunch of things at you. I consider all of you close friends, so are you ready? Pull up a chair…this might be a doozy!
1. My sweet innocent 5 year old son asked me today how people die. If you heard a noise…it was just a piece of my heart breaking.
2. I want him to continue to live in a world where everything is perfect.
3. But, I know that is so far from the truth.
4. I sat him down and tried to explain in terms that he would understand about life, death and heaven.
5. We talked a lot about his daddy’s mommy that passed away in 2002. I wrote about her here.
6. We looked at pictures and he asked questions about her and it ended up being a really wonderful conversation.
7. It was strange because we have not discussed what happened in Boston with him…in fact, we have done quite the opposite and avoided all news programs and talking about it when he is around or listening, but it was like he knew something was up.
8. Boston…there are absolutely no words.
9. I read Jesus Calling everyday and after I heard about the explosions, I turned to it…it read
…from your limited human perspective, it may look as if I’m mismanaging things. But you don’t know what I know or see what I see. If I pulled back the curtain to allow you to view heavenly realms, you would understand much more. However, I designed you to live by faith, not by sight. I lovingly shield you from knowing the future or seeing into the spirit world. Acknowledge My sovereignty by giving thanks in all circumstances.
10. This helped me and I put it out there because maybe it will help you, too.
11. I’m still praying for you, Boston.
12. Wow…this is pretty nitty gritty stuff…no wonder I couldn’t sleep.
13. I also just finished an insanely hard work out…maybe that’s why I feel amped up.
14. Although most say that after a late night work out they crash HARD.
15. The work out is part of a boot camp I signed up for…
16. Get this…it’s called Mudder Brute Camp. It is insanely hard.
17. So, I don’t run, right. Never been a huge fan. The first night of this lovely boot camp, the trainer said “first up, we are going to warm up and then take a short 3 mile jog just to see where everyone is at”
18. My jaw may have hit the pavement and my inner non-runner self was screaming !?!?!????! very loudly in my skull.
19. Needless to say…I came in LAST…so incredibly far behind everyone else. Can you say embarrassing???
20. After the horror, I immediately called my sister and my mother to laugh harder than I have ever laughed before. They know I am no runner and the thought of me running 3 miles was beyond hilarious.
21. We were doing that awesome silent laugh when you are laughing so hard, there is nothing but tears coming down and you may actually snort just to breathe…especially after I told them that when I walked back into the gym after finishing LAST that the trainer may or may not have recruited someone else to stand there and clap for me when I came through the door.
22. My inner self was still screaming ?!?!?!??!??!?. And perhaps “please stop clapping and drawing more attention to my awesomeness”.
23. I have not quit…I mean I wouldn’t want anyone else to have to come in that horrid last spot…the way I see it, I ‘m doing them all a favor.
24. I told my sister, I will never again see a Road Rules/Real World challenge (uh huh…I still might watch that show occasionally) and yell at the person that is walking. I used to think…”how hard can running up that ginormous mountain be?”
25. Thank you, friends, for listening…even though there was no pictures to look at…thank you for being there for me to get things off my chest. Love you guys. ;)